Perceptions

It has been 1 week. 1 week since I started at my kick-ass gym (well, other than the orientation) I've never done this sort of exercise program before, but am a bit surprised. I am not sore all the time (actually since struggling walking for 4 days after orientation ~ 2 weeks ago I haven't been more than a bit achy), I expected quite the opposite. Huh. Maybe I'm not pushing it enough? Everyone else in my classes are moving up in weights & things...I'm still doing all modified moves (1/2 situps to strengthen my silly 1 side that is weaker than the other & making it verrrry difficult to do a proper sit up)

(lunges holding onto a stabilizing rope so I don't fall down because I was not making it low enough to the ground)

(modified squats holding a bar over my shoulders to help balance me I think? Funny, I thought my massive midsection & rear would balance each other out!)

etc. Anyway, I'm able to do more each time, but still think I'm holding back. I was doing a held-pushup (basically you hold it in the middle, not completely up & certainly not down!) & holding it for a minute (hah, working towards that), & I consciously had the thought "I think I should drop now, I can't hold it longer." I didn't drop because my body gave out...I did it because my mind did. I'm going to have to learn to turn off my brain, it's sending all the wrong "Let's fail now" signals to my body!

Regardless, I LOVE THIS WORKOUT!! It may very well be my imagination, but I think I'm already seeing results! At least I'm more confident & happy than I've been in years. I wore a shirt I was scared to wear before because I thought it looked better on me. It may just be my perception is much less negative, but regardless I'm wearing pretty clothes again :)

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Now onto the FOOD aspect of this blog (really the main reason I started here):

1. I'm supposed to eat more protein (ick)

2. I AM eating more protein! Who knew that protein didn't have to be meat & eggs?! At a local shop they sell protein 'packs' of mini bagels, apples, grapes, almonds & pb (yum!) I've been getting one after each morning I work out (3 mornings a week)

3. On the nights when I work out I treat myself to Subway melts, heavy on the green peppers. I like this option because it include carbs (wheat bread), veggies (tomatoes & lots of peppers), & protein (turkey & roast beast), with a bit of melty cheese (my treat to me) & dressing on the side

4. I'm trying to stay away from cereal, yogurts, & yummy Strawberry eggos. Instead I've been making myself oatmeal as many mornings as I can get awake early enough. Plus I add just a dash of brown sugar & dried fruit that is yummy in oatmeal!

Today was NOT a workout day (6am tomorrow is though...), & I did not do as well as I've been doing this past week:

Morning: eggos (really late start, almost late for work!)

Midmorn snack: Special K protein shake (even with the added protein I've been eating I'm still way behind on how much I should have, so I'm supplementing for now)

Lunch: Healthy Choice panini (again, late morning so no time to make a healthy alternative)

Dinner: chicken sandwich on wheat (sadly it was fast food & breaded) with a huge helping of steamed broccoli

Dessert: an icky apple (normally I love apples, this one was gross) with some natural pb (also icky, only should be used for pbj sandwiches)

Secrets of the day: I had a slice of banana bread at work (darn coworkers bringing in too much food :( ), fries with dinner, & a handful or more of white choc chips and 2.5 chocolates for dessert. Oh, and a Coke with lunch & a sweetened lemonade with dinner.

Boo this ending. I'm going to feel it tomorrow at the gym! I feel icky...

No Bakes

Ok, so sadly I don't seem to have the dedication for a daily blog...yet. It is a goal of mine that I'll work on. Let's start with weekly instead :)

Today I'll start with food:

Breakfast: 2 Strawberry eggos, no topping

Mid-morning snack: 1/2 a pbj on wheat with Smuckers Natural w/ a touch of Honey pb & not jelly, it's called 'spreadable fruit' now (cherry)

Lunch: Lean Cuisine Butternut Squash Ravioli (yum!) & a coke

Snack: Special K Strawberry granola bar-thingy

Dinner: 1/3 of a 12 inch Subway club on wheat with swiss, tomatos, pickles, heavy on the green peppers, & honey mustard sauce on the side

Dessert: I'll likely have a no-bake cookie (or not, since I've had 2 half-dollar sized ones already today)

Other:

-I am stressed. Very stressful time at work (that time of the year) and it's my first time doing this stressful-ness

-I joined a kick-ass gym today (finally, right?!) And had a orientation (we learned & practiced the moves) The gym did exactly as it was supposed to. It kicked my ass. Stupid me didn't think to eat anything but that granola bar after 12:30, & the exercise began at 6. Duh.

-One thing my trainer said after he finished taking my weight, BMI (shudder), & measurements (double shudder) was that my nutrition is off. Duh. So now I have to start eating proper amounts of protein. Ugh. Of all things I dislike it's protein. I don't like meat. I rarely eat eggs. And, honestly what else is there? But I will do it. After feeling that dizzy I don't want that again!

Secret of today? Hmm, how about that I stole the second cookie I ate from my coworkers Tupperware without her knowing? I'm bad...but it was yummy! (see, these are the thoughts/spontaneous actions that have gotten me here!)

i feel like typing in all lower case letters today

I've time for a quickie

breakfast: coffee, mini bagel, 5 apple slices, handful of almonds, ~ 10 grapes & pb

lunch: cheese pasta & Sprite Zero

snack: rest of my Sprite Zero & 2 cranberry girl scout cookies

dinner: pork loin w/ gravy, big helping of green beans, (mistake - spoonful of pb prior)

mistake #2: 2 big pieces of cake...ate it without thinking...

2 positives for today though. the 1st being that at work i often sit, but am deliberately walking around more & more. 2nd is i tried to find the gym i want to join this morning, but got lost doing so. i eventually did find it, & really like the look of the place. i'll enjoy going there soon to sign up.

it was sad yesterday that my show was not on. i enjoy the biggest loser because i find their progress motivates me to get goin'. regardless, i am feeling quite motivated without watching this week. maybe it is the olympics & realizing how much those people can do and, while i will not get to their level, i can get much closer than i currently am. sadly tonight my back aches after all the filing i did late in the day at work...it is just a reminder that things need to change & they will not do so on their own.

Don't you just love those days when all your plans go out the window? Yep, 100% fits my day!

Regardless, a quick update on my intake vs. output today (food v. exercise):

Breakfast consisted of 2 buttermilk eggos. I was about to eat a Poptart, but stopped myself because 2 eggos are more than sufficient!

Lunch was a rushed affair as my lunchtime at work has disappeared for the last few weeks...basically I heat up a frozen meal & eat as I talk.

Dinner was the other half of my Thanksgiving-in-a-sub Bobbie from last night. Yum!

Post dinner snacking was my weak spot for today. 1 small slice of red velvet cake with frosting, Special K snack bar, & a cupcake. Oh bother.

I did plan ahead for dessert tonight, and it was great :) (i.e. the correct dessert, not the bad choices above) I went to the 'fancy' mart & splurged to buy produce. Raspberries, Blackberries, the quality oj (Simply Orange is my fav!), & Dannon Light & Fit vanilla yogurt all combined in my new mini-blender/smoothie maker to make a scrumptious smoothie that was admittedly heavy in yogurt, but will be better tomorrow :)

Oh, and I went hog wild & bought quality broccoli, romaine & my guilty pleasure - pb.

. . .

Tomorrow's dinner plan: left over pork loin & green beans

The next night: baked chicken & broccoli

(Finally) Friday: my biggest splurge!: whole wheat cheese ravioli!! I have to find a good recipe for a butter or oil-based dressing, because my least favorite Italian combo is tomato sauce (which is normally amazing the way I make it) with ravioli or other cheese-stuffed pasta. I want to enjoy the calories I am putting in my body & can only do that with a lighter sauce that takes a backseat to the pasta itself.

. . .

Finally, I just have to say U.S.A!! I'm watching the Olympics when I can & am enjoying it greatly!!

Kidnapped & held hostage...

Sooo....16 days off this blog...oops.

Well, for part of that time I was kidnapped & held hostage by the weather, knocking out communication with the outside world. But during the other time I guess I just allowed bad habits to grab hold again (I've always struggled with consistently doing things)

Anyway, quick review of the past...16 days...:

I started out trying very hard to do well. Prior to the Weather of Feb 2010, I made a delish turkey chili & stocked up on good-for-you yummies. (veggies, low fat yogurts, etc)

However, just before the storm I'd purchased all the makings for a cake to take to work. That meant icing was in my house...dun dun DUN!

Yes, while in some regards I was 'good' while trapped inside, I also was bad. The icing was gone at the end of the week, I overdid in after No-Cheese January, & was tempted to break No-Chocolate February. Plus I snacked...oh boy did I. String cheese is a down fall of mine (like pb...did I mention I like pb?) & I went through 2 packs in 10 days. Ugh. BIG TIME Ugh.

Then, after the 1st storm I went out to replenish my cake-making supplies to prep for work starting again...& Storm Two hit! Icing gone a second time...

And, my sneaking prowess was put to the test during all of this. Both my roomie & boyfriend were there for much of the time. Parts of the week felt like Mission Impossible. Oh, but I was Kim Possible, complete with ringtone & very own personal Wade.

I did exert a lot of energy in shoveling, but that's about it. Video games & work took over other than that (and reading, I have a not-at-all-secret affair with reading consistently)

. . .

Now to explain my No-____ Month comments. As my New Years Resolution I decided to give up something instead of adding something. Plus, as I've mentioned I'm rarely consistent with things like this, so I'm working in short increments rather than a full year. Each month I am giving up food. Not just any food, it has to be something that will be challenging for me. (no No-Steak September!...that would be a piece of cake)

So, for January I gave up cheese. That was hard. I've always been a cheesy person (haha), in particular mozzarella & more recently cheese in a can. (gross sounding I know, but surprisingly yum)

Other than 2 inadvertent flubs I kept to it (I didn't read ingredients closely enough) Yay!

One side affect that this month had on my body (other than me learning to read ingredients much more closely), is that my nails started to split. Now I've always had very good nails...to the point where the one time I tried to get fake nails they refused because they didn't want to ruin them... However, I think I didn't get enough calcium or something during Jan, because my nails became a hot mess. Fortunately that is getting better as this month goes on.

Now February is No-Chocolate. This is not the hardest thing in the world for me, as I truly am not a huge chocolate fan, but around V-day...it's difficult. So, to combat any weakness, I've taken this on. Now, it is challenging when there are boxes (yes, plural) of chocolate in the kitchen, some of it Godiva... But I'm holding out.

. . .

Final thing for now. my goal for this week is to join a gym. I've been wanting to do this for awhile, but wasn't sure which one to join. There are typical gyms all over the place near me, but my experience with them has been svelt guys attempting to benchpress whole buildings, & models trying to attract the attention of their counterparts...all while I'm getting to be a hot sweaty mess & waiting an hour for an elliptical to open up. Oh, yeah, and experiencing extreme redfacedness from all the looks & not-so-whispered comments when people saw me.

So, I'm looking for something better than the 'typical' gym. I heard both good & bad things about Curves, so that's an option. But there is another option as well that I'm going to try. It's this place that uses equipment you'd never find in Snooty-Skinnies Only clubs. Things like ropes, kettle drums, etc. This is intriguing to me & I want to try to find time to get over there this week...and hopefully not get laughed out of there.

Alrighty, I'll post later. Promise.

Master snacker

This post will actually be about yesterday. Most of the evening I spent with my roomie, and she does not know about this blog (Secret Affair, remember?)...so I could not post until now.

Yesterday was bad. I was alone the bulk of the day because my roomie decided to brave the weather, but I did not. Alone all day when I can't go outside led to my secret expertise: snacking

I will break my 'Food' category down into smaller increments w/ short explanations for some of them:

Breakfast: 2 Buttermilk Eggo waffles. No toppings (syrup is yucky & I'm out of pb)

2nd breakfast: 2 more Buttermilk Eggo waffles (apparently the normal amount is too little for me :( )

Elevenses: a handfull of yogurt-covert pretzel balls

Luncheon: my white rice left over from Friday with soy sauce

Afternoon tea: 2 cups of Special K with skim milk

Dinner: 2 more cups of Special K with skim milk (this was when my roommate came home & I said I was having 'lunch' because, despite the names of these meals...most were eaten before ~4pm)

Supper: A Green Giant freezer meal. It was GOOD. Composed of edamame, legumes, green beans, and carrots in a light sauce (100 calories, yay)

I know there were at least 3 more handfuls of yogut covered pretzel balls during the day.

Now, in addition to my hobbit-named meals (yes, I stole them from LotR if you hadn't guessed), I spent the bulk of the day on my couch. Playing video games. Oh brother.

So yesterday was NOT full of joy & joyness, but rather laziness & bad choices. Plus, I did not get any work done for next week, so I also did not meet a goal that I made for the weekend.

On to today, I will post later about my food & activities...but my goal for today: dig out, get alllll my work complete, do sit ups or something to get my blood pumping, oh, & not eat too much chocolate (again, explain later)

Gotta love those UPs!

Today had its serious ups...and serious downs.

UPs: In 2 separate settings with 2 separate hot guys I had some fun conversations. Now, this is abnormal for me considering 1) I work in a environment that is heavy on the estrogen, 2) guys never look at me, and 3)I don't get out much. New place, new job, & an initially shy personality (until you get to know me that is...then I'm obnoxiously outgoing) makes it difficult to just walk into the local watering hole & find a friend, let alone a guy.

Regardless of my lack of social prowess, today I got to chat with 2 hotties! (and I actually instigated one conversation, win!) It helped make up for some of the rest of the day.

CONs: Work was a !*#$^ today. Enough said.

After work I was supposed to hang out with someone, waited around for an hour in my frigid car waiting & then heard that it was cancelled. After breaking the icicles off my nose I made a snap (bad) decision. And that leads me to:

FOOD: Oye.

(This is the part where I log all I've eaten)

-Let's start at the very beginning... Breakfast consisted of a mini-bagel, peanut butter, 1/2 an apple, about 8 grapes, and approximately 12 salted almonds. (Oh, and the coffee that helped prompt cutie conversation 1)

-Lunch was non existant. My lunchtime was eaten up (haha) by work. Actually I do remember a coworker bringing in beans/rice with chicken. I had a cup of it (though I think it belongs more under breakfast as I ate it early)

-Dinner was that snap decision that my partially frostbitten brain made. A full (albeit small) container of moo goo gai pan, 1 shrimp egg roll, and 8 steamed dumplings. Oh, and a Coke.

Now I'm not upset with myself for breakfast, or even for dinner (though I definitely should have cut the portions in 1/2 or thirds). What I'm mad at me about is lunch. What was I thinking? Skipping a meal is inviting bad decisions later on that are at least partially prompted by hunger!

Now, my normal struggle (as I mentioned yesterday) is with snacks & sneaking. Today I did relatively well. I think I just had a couple Kisses at work, and the rest of the Coke 2liter bottle (it only had about a glass left) after dinner.

However, TGIF! Goals for the weekend:

-get my work done early for next week

-work out somewhere, somehow (looking for a gym & a gym buddy)

-NOT be peeved all weekend about stupid stuff

-get prepped for no-chocolate Feb. (I'll explain later)